Bachelor Recap: And then there were 3

We're in Thailand and Sean has a tough decision ahead.

He ponders life in his baby blue tank top and flip-flops.  He's looking fratty today.  The only thing(s) missing are some croakies for his sunglasses and maybe a visor.  Apparently he's not thinking about who he's giving a rose to, but who he sees a future with.  Isn't that one in the same Sean?

Now we get a trip down memory lane with Cath.  He can see them getting cozy on the couch after a long day.  Sean says he has the strongest relationship with AshLee because she wears her heart on her sleeve.  She embodies the American dream.  Lindsay is the spark that turned in to the flame.  Cheese ball.  There's more to her than the crazy drunk girl that showed up in the wedding dress.

Sean needs to take some core exercise tips from Bach Brad.  He ponders the meaning of life over the negative edge of the pool.

First Romantic Date?  Lindsay.  I feel like I've seen her outfit before...did she borrow some of Lesley's clothes before she got booted?  Lindsay gets the treat of strolling through a Thai market in 6" wedges and a skirt.  Lindsay will try anything but bugs, and Sean wants to test her limits.  Lindsay ate a silk worm and tried not to dry heave.  Then she just lets herself go and eats a grasshopper, a fried chicken foot.  I mean, where do you draw the line??  It has to be somewhere between the pastel baby chicks and fried chicken feet, just sayin'.
 
Next, they go sit and ponder their relationship on a humid beach.  Sean tells her she's his BFF and they have so much fun together and that totally translates in to real life marriage material.  Then they feed some grapes to rabid monkeys and make out on the beach as the sun sets.
 
Lindsay leaves nothing to the imagination in her dress that looks like its made for a doll. Entirely too short and tight.  They have dinner at the equivalent of a Thai carnival.  Sean seriously needs to find some SPF stat.  Sean does a feeler to see if she'd be willing to move to the big D.  He talks about buying houses, it was a bit too much at this stage of their relationship...Lindsay says she gets tongue-tied around him, she must mean that literally because all these two do is make out.  Lindsay amps herself up to drop the L-bomb, and then some dancers emerge wearing some legit Thai costumes.  They kind of resembled human origami with some nail streamers.
 
Fantasy suite card time.  She doesn't hesitate to accept, she practically dressed in her nightie and probably has a toothbrush stashed somewhere.   If Sean says he wants a best friend one more time I'm going to choke.  That's what Facebook is for.  They go check out the room and then the forced one-sided I love you happens...Sean's "inspired"
 
AshLee's date.  Can she surrender control and let Sean lead?  Hopefully sans blindfold this time.
 
What is she wearing? Mesh t-shirt and white shorts?  Yikes.  They set sail for the high seas and practice their best titanic poses.  How many necklaces does she have on?  Sean takes AshLee to a cave because he likes to see women with abandonment issues hyperventilate. That poor snakeskin triangle top is doing its best to keep the buzzies covered, but I think she might have bought this in the junior's department.
 
She knows she needs to trust in a relationship, but can she do it??  She's not comforted that Sean has no idea where he's going inside the cave.  You're not exactly inspiring trust here Sean.  He could try to be the slightest bit comforting.  She gets freaked out because its "pitch dark and you can't see anything."  She self talks her way through it in true therapy fashion and they "find the light at the end of the tunnel."  He's now AshLee's protector. Vomit
 
Sean: "I've never seen anything like this in my life."
Me: "You must not have watched Ashley Hebert's season of the Bachelorette."  Pretty sure this was taken out of the Bachelor date manual.
 
AshLee: "I don't feel like there are 2 human beings that belong together more than him and I"
Me: Bold.Statement.
 
Every part of AshLee's being wants to be engaged to Sean, not just her ring finger.  Her hearts not in to putting out in the fantasy suite and she hopes he feels the same.  She talks about making poor marriage decisions and she's glad she waited for the right guy...did we just gloss over her marriage at 17??
 
Fantasy suite card.  What will she choose??  Question marks added for dramatic effect. Sean sets her at ease with his expectations, and she says she okay with the alone time. Sean says he's falling in love.  AshLee lays out her exact specifications for an engagement ring, again BOLD!  I'm nervous for her if this goes south...
Cath does a running sprint for her man on the beach.  She has some catching up to do being the last date.  They take a pirate boat out to sea to explore, and again with the titanic poses...her bikini is not going well with the off-the-shoulder dress.
 
Sean is looking to catch up and Cath explains that she's been silly, but she hopes he sees her serious side.  Sean thinks Cath is the perfect mold for his BFF but he needs to know if their lives can match up for the long haul.  Cath says she's "expired" her time in Seattle. What does that mean?  Do you need to put more change in the life meter?  Cath explains that she was pissed about the sister interrogation because she felt there was some sabotage going on over jealousy. Cath says she was in a serious relationship that didn't work out and now she knows what it takes to make it.
 
It boggles her mind that she found the perfect man who is attracted to her.  The do flips off the back of the boat as she holds her nose, haha.  Then they make out for the next 5 minutes...in the rain.  Is the thunderstorm foreshadowing??
 
Cath is rocking the beach hair at dinner.  Sean feels like she really 'gets' him and he really 'gets' her.   She brings up the one-sided nature of expressing feelings on the show, and Sean gives her the consolation prize saying he could see himself marrying her.  Then she goes in to this big spiel about the moral dilemma of the fantasy suite.  Who knew we'd have so many prudes this season?  Has ABC found its conscience?
 
So basically they're all just going to shack, Baylor style.  For those of you who need some explanation on what this means: stay up all night talking and making out then putting on your Sunday best to pretend like you went to church as you go gorge at Ninfa's.
 
In true nerd fashion she geeks out about her hunky, beefy boyfriend.  She talks about being bullied and he tells her she's 'smoking hot'.  It finally dons on Cathy that like, they're in a relationship.  She falls in love.
 
Then, we're pulled from Thailand back to the Bach mansion where ABC fills air time with a promo for Oz the Great and Powerful.  Really? I can YouTube this stuff on my own time.
 
Sean intimates that he's made his decision and regretfully he has stronger feelings for 2 out of 3 women.  Who better than to decompress with than Chris Harrison.  He's having déjà vu from his departure with Emily.  He never imagined sending this girl home..I'm thinking that eliminates Lindsay since she almost went home night 1.  Cathy was kind of in the same boat.  Then he brings up sweetness and love and we all know who it is...
 
Sean's pretty confident that he will get down on one knee.  He gets his head in the clouds, and then Harrison brings him back to reality with not letting him look ahead to next week without dealing with today.
 
Home boy sure does love him some purple.  And I don't know what color those pants are, but I'm not digging the combo.  Harrison leaves him to ponder photographs and the video messages.
 
Lindsay mentions that they met in a wedding gown and she hopes she can wear another one again for him soon.
 
Cath says she knew he was a good guy coming on the show, a mega hunk and when they kiss she gets the wiggles.
 
Ash says all of her walls are coming down because of Sean and who he is.  I'm thinking she needs to meet Jesus.  He's pretty great too.  He will complete you, not Sean.  She can't get a grip on camera and says she's no longer broken?  I'm thinking its sinking in right now that he's not designed to fill this role for her.  Too much pressure...
 
Not digging Cath's dress.  Holy boobs AshLee.
 
Sean, I too am worried for AshLee's emotional state once you let her go...
 
Did Lindsay just say the "F" word?  Get a grip girl.  She gets the first rose.
 
AshLee has a pretty good stone face going.  Cath looks like she might pass out.  Cath gets the rose and all of the air leaves the room...
 
Her love and sweetness has turned bitter REAL quick.  She doesn't even want to hear his explanation.  He says he wants to give her closure and its just salt in the wound.  I have never seen a bitchier stare in my entire life...lock your doors ladies and gentleman she has that crazy look in her eye.

She talks about how this was serious to her not a joyride filled with fun and laughter...clearly a dig at the other two college-aged girls left standing.  I was really expecting her to fall a part, but those walls went right back up in to place.  Poor thing.  Lose that necklace while you're at it.

Can't wait for the Women Tell All, or as I like to call it, The Women Tell Us Everything We Already Knew.

Bachelor Recap: Home Towns

--> Now we’re at the hometown dates.  Can someone please explain why there are 2 nights of the Bachelor AGAIN?!  Also, why is poor Sean being portrayed like the 40-year-old virgin on the cover of US Weekly and explaining how his fiancé is ‘dealing with it.’  This is just sad.

First Home Town Date: Houston, TX-AshLee

Her outfit kind of looks like Sandy’s from Grease.  She explains how she never knew what true love was until meeting Sean.  Did they coordinate the plaid shirt/dark jeans combo??  How cute.  Sean feels the pressure since AshLee has professed her love.  It adds a layer of “intensity” to meeting the ‘rents.  To cool the nerves, they drink white wine out of these giant wine goblets.  AshLee wants to marry someone like her dad, and Sean fits the bill.  The similarities are uncanny, and of course Sean can’t resist adding how great his dad is in to the mix.  I’m sure he’s full on sweating right now.  She’s amazed, I’m bored.  This could only be better if they were sitting in a field of bluebonnets.  Money shot.

Sean shows up with a bouquet of flowers.  They eat outside on the lawn.  Totally normal?  Dad wants to know where they’ve been, who she’s met, what they’ve seen.  I’m already exhausted by the hammering of questions and they just sat down.  AshLee brings up the Lake Louise story and her baptismal experience.  Then she tells her parents about the romance in St. Croix and there’s some throat-clearing and eyebrow-raising from these conservative folks.  Sean’s face can’t get any redder, but I think he blushed.

Deborah can tell she’s over the moon for Sean.  She’s a mama bear and wants to protect her daughter’s fragile heart.  There’s a theme of abandonment in her life (5 foster homes in a year), and now she’s abandoned herself to Sean…I’m nervous.  Bruce wants to know if he loves his daughter and he says he’s crazy about her and love is on the horizon.  What?  Worst.wording.ever.  He brings up the big, terrible, awful in AshLee’s past and his take on the sitch.  Dad says he took the path of least resistance and let her make her own choices.

Then Dad recalls the first day he met AshLee.  And I die.  The sweetest thing I’ve ever heard.  As a fellow foster parent, I get it.  Her dad says, ‘the first moment I saw her, I fell in love with her.  Some man is going to have to love her like that.’  Precious.

Second Home Town Date: Seattle, WA-Catherine

Of course they go to tourist central.  Pike Place Market.  They straddle a pig and make wishes.  Sean’s found the fun with Catherine and now that the romance is there, it’s all set.  Sean steps behind the counter to try and catch some flying fish.  He wants to know if it’s like catching a football.  What a doof.  Then it’s Catherine’s turn and after dropping a couple, she gets it figured out.  Catherine likes his smell (?), big beefy arms, and his acceptance of her.  I hope this isn’t the order of priority.

Side note, are Sean’s pants purple?

Sean learns some Filipino traditions to impress Grandma Lola, or graham-cracker as the fam likes to call her.  Now they’re ready, but Catherine’s worried someone might try to mess it up for her.  Sean remembered the hand to the forehead, so maybe things are getting off to a good start.  He’s rolling loompia(?) with mom, getting hit on by grandma…what could go wrong?  Sister sabotage. 

They ask if she would say yes to an engagement and Catherine gives a weird backwards answer.  The sisters feel like they’re being forced to like him.  They think she has her head in the clouds. 

Sean gets the sisters aside and so far I’ve only heard the older one speak.  The other is the trusty sidekick.  He asks if they think she’s ready for marriage and they basically tell him sure, as long as you don’t want kids right away, you keep it fun, and support all of her dreams.  Otherwise she’s going to peace out.  Real encouraging.  The sisters are not doing her any favors: messy (but not gross), moody…

He’s hoping to get a better sense from mom.  Mom wants her to be happy, but she’s not totally sure if they’ll work out.  She doesn’t want anyone to be led on.  Sean asks for her blessing, and mama says we’ll see.  Burn.  Filipinos-1, Sean-0

Third Home Town Date: Ft. Leonard Wood, MO-Lindsay

Sean is nervous to meet the 2-star general.  Yikes.  Sean’s purple sweater would be more tolerable if it wasn’t fitted at the waist.  The go to the 3 stores that exist in the town and go to some antique shops.  Then they have some brews and have some back and forth over whether to call him the General?  Mark?  They finally decide on Mr. Yenter.  Lindsay doesn’t know how intense the grilling will be. 

And then…she brings out some fatigues and makes him change and harasses him in front of the American flag on the base.  Cheeeeeesy, but kinda funny.  Then he has to work out in his Keds.  I bet he wishes he packed manlier shoes.

They get to the house in the base and there are quite a few flags out front.  Sean says something about Lindsay’s dad “making men” and he hopes he sees him as a man that can protect his daughter.  I’m thinking you already have 2 strikes showing up in purple and those shoes...Sean makes her tell the fam about her showing up in a wedding dress.  The general didn’t seem to find it too funny.

He gets grilled by mom and deflects the love question with an “I’m not at liberty to say”; um these are her parents you might want to find a more affectionate way of putting it.  He says that when he says I love you it would be to the final girl standing.  Her mom respects that answer.  She says Lindsay’s ready for marriage, children, etc.  Sean sees the potential with the mother-in-law as well.  He asks mom for tips on how to warm over the general.  She says just be yourself.

The general doesn’t want to see his baby girl get hurt.  He’s a softie when it comes to her.  Sean asks dad for his blessing.  He says it’s tough, he’s never been asked a tougher question in his life.  He goes in to his army background and being a parachuter and it’s all about assessing risk and being decisive and being dropped in to enemy territory and authority to make decisions, blah blah blah this is all starting to go over my head, but at some point there’s a glass clink and a cheers and I think we got a blessing.  Sean says the general’s not intimidating, but a very nice guy.  A man can be nice and still intimidating…He leaves with a memento of the experience, some ID tags with army values.  Lindsay says “I love you” and that she’s found her husband.

Fourth Home Town Date: Los Angeles, CA-Desiree

Sean’s recycling some outfits.  Particularly the pink shorts and purple/black softball tee.  Not a good combo.  They go hiking and she tells him how much she missed him.  And they make out.  A lot.  You really get a good sense of the smog covering the city as the sun sets.

They head to a small house, I think it’s hers. He sees the art on the wall that she did.  They make dinner for her parents.  I’m wondering if her parents have made it out of the tent city.  They probably would have shown every one the ropes on that Carnival Cruise mishap. 

Knock at the door.  Who could it be?  He thinks it could be her brother, but then he professes his love to her.  Sean’s about twice his size and the dude is wearing a plaid shirt (tucked in) and khakis…no need to get all macho Sean.  It gets really awkward, Sean is clenching/unclenching his fists.

I’m confused by Dez’s shirt.  Is backless and swoopy?!  And then PSYCH!  Dez knows how to play a practical joke.  I’m thinking this paid “actor” must have come on the cheap.  Dez is impressed by his macho, protective side.  Now it’s time to meet the parents.  Her brother looks like he’s ready to rough somebody up.  Roxanne and Tony seem harmless.

The brother is the wild card.  He asks how her relationship compares to the other girls.  She thinks hers is the strongest.  He says don’t fall for him.  He thinks this show is a joke.  He’s kinda right, but in a very intense/aggressive way.  He pulls Sean aside in the middle of dinner.  Dez is worried.  Her brother starts in and says he doesn’t think he’s very in to his sister and she’s in to him, and that he doesn’t see a connection between them that would lead to marriage.  He calls him a “playboy” and that he thinks he just likes to go around and have fun with each one and lead them all on.  I think we have a case of some truth-telling that’s overshadowed by his prison-like appearance, which makes it hard to tell if it’s sincere.  Sean says his integrity and character is everything to him and he doesn’t want to be defrauded by Nate…

They go back inside as they try to sweep it under the rug, and then dinner gets really awkward.  Tony starts talking about the weather and it all starts to go down hill.  Sean leaves early, and then the family turns on each other.

Later, we get a glimpse of the rose ceremony conundrum.  The two awkward home town dates (Cath and Dez) are on the chopping block and Dez is going to try for a hail mary…

Cocktail Ceremony

Ah, Chris Harrison comes in for the therapy session.  Sean is thrown by Desiree’s home town visit and the incident with her brother.  With Catherine, he doesn’t know if their lives align with her independence and career pursuits. What is with Sean’s velour polka-dot looking tie?!?!

Sean expresses his wavering emotions in front of the girls and Dez decides that this would be a good time to pull him aside and apologize and try to smooth things over.

Fantasy Dates Go To: AshLee, Lindsay and….we’re waiting.  In a dramatic moment, Sean drops the rose back on the platter and heads back to the framed photos to mull it over.  This has got to be torture for the roseless back in the room.

Sean wasn’t expecting the hail mary and now feels bad about sending Dez home.  As if you weren’t already going to feel bad?  Dez is sent home.  Or down the street.  Sean is a douche and tells her she has every quality he’s looking for in a wife and thinks he’s going to wake up tomorrow and regret it.  Ughhh.  Desiree explains what a giant mistake he’s making.  He looks like a coward that can’t stand up for his decisions. 

I feel a Bachelorette set-up in the makings…

Bachelor Recap: St. Croix

We're down to 6, Hallelujah!  Can't wait to see what Tierrable has in store for us this evening.

St Croix is boss.  Officially not boring.

The girls arrive at the Buccaneer hotel and realize they'll have to share rooms/bed.  Tierra doesn't want to share a room with girls who like her boyfriend, so she rolls out a cot so she can focus on Sean.  I think she's on the losing end of this deal, personally.

Date card time, Tierra is shooting daggers.  AshLee gets the date to 'get carried away' and makes some cheesy references about being physically and emotionally carried away...barf.

Tierra calls her a cougar when she walks away, I guess 32 is the new 52??  Apparently you should have a husband, house and 2.5 kids by 32.  Does this girl even work?

Sean is wearing this coral button down and black and white prison striped swim trunks.  What?  He brings up the blindfolding incident again and I'm uncomfortable.  She has such a pure heart.  If she doesn't get chosen I worry for her.

The girls are having a Tierra bash...and that leads us to AshLee spilling the Tierrable beans on her date with Sean.  If you're constantly having to take a drama meter on this 1 girl shouldn't that tell you something??  I think it's weird he asks the other girls for their opinions.  You do realize they're all dating you right?

Tierra finally gets a one on one, and she's complaining about what the date is.  She doesn't like people, bugs, or her makeup dripping off.  She wants to go boating or something.

Dinner time with Ash and Sean.  Sean asks about any skeletons in the closet...Ash has some deep dark secret apparently.  She got married at 17... Cause she was mad at mom and dad.  She feels like she was Debbie downer on the date.  He reassures her and then they stand up and yell to no one on their wicker chairs on the beach in the matching purple, Barney-colored shirts.  It was lame.

Now on to Tierra the Terrible.  The one plus to this date is she loves shopping and actually said he bought her the most incredible things someone could buy on a first date...someone should raise their expectations.  Soap and a Rastafarian necklace aren't on my top 2 for first date gifts.  Isn't this duty free paradise?  Where's the Yurman store??

And now a random mardi gras-ish parade with locals.  She's footloose and fancy free and Sean finds himself once again sucked in to her devilish charm.  However, he does bring up the recent drama and asks her how that's going.  She gets visibly annoyed that Sean's asking her about her relationships with the other girls.  Everything she does she says they do to her, I.e. ignoring, isolating.  She picks up on the fact that there's a bug in his ear and is determined to squash it.  Lookout.

Lesley's name is not on the group date card so she gets the last one on one.

Dinner time.  The vibe's off.  Tierra's not feeling the 'closeness'.  He says the drama with the women in the house put them a step behind.  She's not going to let the other girls bring her down, so she decides to take it up a notch and says she's falling in love with him.  Yuck

Group date.  Rise and shine at 4:42 am.  Is Lindsay naked?  I'm worried.  They're watching the sunset on one side of the island and then driving to the other side of the island for sunset.  Sean loves road trips, not surprised he takes after dear old dad.  For as big of a guy as he is, he should wear manlier tennis shoes.  And for as many drinks as they're having at each spot, this could be DUI material.

Des seems to be the date hog and tensions are rising.  She's not sharing shotgun and the other girls don't like it.  And then Sean has them all pose for a group photo.  I hope that's a camera promo cause that was so awkward.

Sean and Lindsay reminisce about the fateful wedding dress night and how far they have come.

Catherine opens up about her daddy issues and why he won't be there if she gets a home town.  Im distracted by Sean's gross skinned up knee and dire need of sunscreen.  Back to the serious moment, Sean thinks Cath might be a little intimidated by his great relationship with his dad/parents. Not everyone is jealous of your parents Sean, just sayin'.

Ash and Lesley are having a Tierra bash while she's strategically sitting nearby.  Ash says she doesn't think Tierra has the guts to confront her, and we see the dent in T's forehead pulsing.  It's about to go down.  Just night right now...but that pot's about to boil.

Is Des's home town going to be in a tent?  I sure hope so.  She talks about how important her family is and how she can't wait for him to meet them.  Then she gets super emo.  There are tears...emotions are running hot.  She probably thinks she's got the rose in the bag...

Rose goes to Lindsay.  "The crazy girl that showed up in a wedding gown now has a home town rose."  Couldn't have said this better myself.  Date plan fail, Sean doesn't know where he west is for the sunset.  Oh well, he's having such a great time with 3 women competing for his attention.

Lesley date.  He wants to get away and talk, none of that fancy stuff.  He's not sure if they can get ahead in their relationship because he feels they're behind.  Lesley is in love.  Uh oh, he looks so bored.  She needs to get her roots done.  He asks if there's anything he needs to know, and she looks like she's seen a ghost, awkward pauses and then she randomly says lets go pick some fruit??  I think this girl is dating challenged.  She won't make eye contact and Sean is getting over the coy act and is ready for her confidence to spill over to their relationship.  You're probably so uncomfortable because this is forced...their date seemed oddly short compared to the others

Shay, Sean's sister is there to give some advice.  She says the girls need to be tough cookies and they'll get over it if they get sent home.  Wow, no mercy.  Tierra is the only one he's questioning openly to sis.

Back at the crib, Tierra and AshLee are having it out.  T starts it, and says she doesn't hang out with the other girls because she doesn't do high school conversation.  She talks about her age like that equals maturity.  Ash calls it like she sees it and says she has bad character.  Then T says the girls are just jealous because men love her.  Yikes.  Then she starts throwing ghetto hand signs and says she can be confident and humble at the same time.  I think she trying to convince herself more than anyone else.   She peaces out, but then can't stand that everyone might be talking about her and she's not there.  Confrontation Round 2.

This is getting ridiculous.  Now we're in to not being able to control our faces and expressions/eyebrows, parents...this might be my favorite line: "Tierra you have a sparkle, don't let those other girls take your sparkle away."  Apparently these are the comforting things parents tell their children out in this world.  This.is.so.sad.

Sean wants to go grab Tierra in the middle of tierranado...Sean's trying to get her to go meet his sister and he gets sucked in to the drama.  She tries to throw Ash under the bus.  Didn't she just say she doesn't need to sabotage others to get the top?  He decides to take a breather.  Sissy Shay told him to stay away from the girl who can't get along with the other girls.  She totally crumbles when he says he wants her to meet his sister, what?  That was opportunity for her to get it together...but no.

Sean sees an opportunity and says I'm crazy about you, have been from day one.  And since I care so much about you I think it's best if you go home now.  Such a backwards way of dumping a girl, but whatever.  Buh bye!  I guess her fight is gone because she doesn't even fight to stay.

She freaks out and ugly cries in the cab.  Wahhhh I can't believe he did this to me...uhh pretty sure you did this to yourself.  I can't wait for the women tell all.  I hope she still has that special sparkle.

The ladies are all sitting waiting for the cocktail party and wondering what happened to Sparkle.  Sean shows up in a classic suit and no pencil tie, thanks to wardrobe tonight for not making him look like a leashed dog.

He explains that he sent Tierra home and that from here on out he has a zero tolerance for drama.  Be warned ladies. He also drops the bomb that there's no need for a cocktail party he's made his choice.  He walks out and takes all of the air with him.

Lesley thinks this is the kiss of death for AshLee.  Ash doesn't think she's drama at all she's just a mama bear based off her upbringing and need to protect him.  I think that's a reach given he's dating multiple women at the same time.

Lindsay's sitting pretty with a rose.  The remaining 3 go to: Desiree, Catherine, AshLee

Poor Lesley with cartoon puppy eyes.  AshLee thinks this seals the marriage vows, easy sister.  On the bright side, Lesley could totally go to a Mexican fiesta in that dress.  There were no words between him and Lesley.  Such an awkward goodbye and could tell there was no love loss there.  Catherine has an all out meltdown cause she thought he and Lesley were already monogramming his and her towels since they have so much in common.  She has no idea what he wants and is looking for...I guess she thinks she's next out the door?  So confused, how is this earth shattering??  I think it's safe to say he's not looking for a woman with a manly voice trying to be one of the guys...

I can't wait for Sean to meet the Sarge, Dez's overly agressive brother, and Cath's crazy sisters...this should be good.

Can I just say that for once I feel like there are 4 solid choices? I mean they all have their bit of crazy, but still.  Who's your favorite?

Bachelor Recap: Canada, Oh Canada

--> Sean says he loves Canada and Lake Louise as we’re treated to the visual feast of what looks like a pond, some broken trees and slate rock…

He has some disappointments from Montana and he doubted if his wife was in the room.

Okay the ladies’ view is much nicer!  Gorge.  That water does not look like a normal color of water, it’s a serene baby blue.

Chris Harrison shows up in a zipper cardigan with blazer over, interesting combo.  He explains there’s a group date and two one on ones with roses up for grabs.

Catherine gets a one on one date: “Let’s find our fairy tale ending.”  Catherine is happy to be here and enjoy this space with him.  What?

Catherine is left by herself in frigid/blizzard-like conditions, freezing.  Finally Sean shows up in a monster truck bus and says they’re going to play in a glacier.  Catherine gets a warm body suit to accompany her massive hoop earrings.  Perfect for sledding on a glacier.  They’re doing somersaults, handstands…it’s snowing so hard that Sean looks like Mr. Freeze.  Apparently all this fun is perfect wife material.

They go on a carriage ride to a glass castle, pretty baller honestly.  These two kids are giddy with excitement.  Chiseling dirty ice in to their cups, clearly romantic.  Someone with artistic vision froze roses in to ice.

Group Date: “Let’s bare our souls.”  Everyone’s called but Desiree.  Daniella is confused and I’m thinking this is a permanent state of mind for her.

Back to Catherine, she’s telling about a dramatic experience at 12.  One of her friends died in front of her on a hiking trip.  This experience showed her life values: marriage, kids.  She wants to be with him because she thinks they could be great.  I’m scratching my head, Sean’s heart is melting.

GROUP DATE.  The girls look annoyed.  AshLee makes the most of it and runs in for the hug.  Fortunately there’s no leg straddling as in typical Bachelor fashion.

There are 7 girls and 3 canoes.  One girl gets to go with Sean.  Lesley calls dibs and there are a lot of death stares shooting in her direction.

Sweet Sarah rises to the challenge even though this will be a difficult date for her.  She’s looking lovely in the peachy pink scarf.

Lesley lets Sean do all of the work and just turns around to soak it all in.  The other girls are royally pissed now.  Selma wishes a giant fish would just come and eat their boat right then…and then she dorky laughs for 3 seconds at her own joke.  Bless her.

Sean has got on some pretty tight pants…hey-o.  He tells the girls they’re going on a Lake Louise polar bear plunge to join some club.  I’m thinking Sean might need some assistance getting out of those pants.  Selma has about 0 incentives to go for the plunge, whether or not it’s for a rose.  She won’t put her life at risk.  I mean, it is like 0 degrees outside apparently.  She pulls the Baghdad card again…I mean didn’t you just say you don’t do heat a couple of weeks ago?? 

AshLee wants to bail too, but she’s feeling pressure.  Finally they decide to go and there’s lots of screaming.  Daniella says something dumb about being hot and they could be hot and cold together I dunno.  They are in the water for .5 seconds and then run out to robes and coffee, I know the Tierra freak out is coming…

I mean I understand the concern for AshLee she has like 0% body fat, but Tierra?  Come on.  Sean looks like he’s miserable himself so he just lets the professionals handle it.  Sadly it takes like 4 people to carry her to the car.  She’s shaking uncontrollably, not talking.  They ask her what day it is, she doesn’t know.  This is crazy…the camera’s in her face and she crumples and says “I missed time with him.”  WOW.  Academy Award goes to her.

Cut to her in a robe in her room with oxygen, some random lady massaging her feet and her chowing down on a cheeseburger.  WHAT?!?!  I’m dying laughing.  Is this real life?

Tierra decides to not come to dinner, but in true drama fashion, she’s going to crash the party later.

Lesley is ready to let her guard down.  Lesley says she loves love and is so happy to be there and feel those feelings.  Sean says he appreciates her.  What?  They makeout.

Sarah lets her guard down too and brings some family photos.  It was really sweet.  Sean is struck by the reality of the situation and seems to kinda freak out.

Desiree gets her date card: Don’t be afraid…to fall in love.  Everyone’s wondering where Sean’s heads at with giving one girl two one on one dates.

Back to drama land.  Tierra walks in as every one is talking about her.  Lesley says everyone needs to watch out because we’ve got a Tierrarist on our hands.  Ahahaha.

Oh, and what’s that?  Oh no big deal, just Lindsay and Sean making out by the hot tub…

Later, Sean gives this speech before giving out the rose and Tierra, by the look on her face, is certain she will get it.  Denied.  The look on her face when he said Lesley’s name was priceless.  I can tell she probably wants to implode right now, but she’s holding it together.

Oh no, Sean’s brooding.  Is he going to dump someone early??  Oh no, he’s going to send Sarah home because he doesn’t see forever with her.  Sad face.  Poor thing!  This whole I’m not in to you conversation is terrrrrrible.  Poor thing, you’ll find the right guy.  Just between us, this show is not meant for a nice, shy girl like you.  It’s meant for the overly forward, flirtatious and aggressive women in the world that may or may not have serious issues that should not be fixed by a relationship but with therapy.

Moving on, Desiree is going to have to earn her picnic.  This is designed to be a confidence builder.  I just noticed with camera close-ups that she has a butt chin.  That’s unfortunate.  They’re going to have to rappel down a sheer 400’ cliff.  No big deal.  Apparently this also a commitment builder as well?  Dez says Sean’s a good cheerleader and he says I cheered in high school.  And then there’s that moment, when you don’t know if he’s kidding or serious…They talk, they kiss, they climb trees.  Later they have dinner in a tepee.  Sean is wearing a gosh awful sweater…like so ugly.  I was distracted until she started talking about living in a tent as child, a trailer park…what??  Oh the irony of it all.  She gets a rose; he needs to get rid of that sweater.

Cocktail Party.

Selma, to the shame of her family lays one on him.  Shouldn’t her massive cleavage be equally shameful?

Lindsay makes a pact not to kiss Sean the whole time they’re talking.  Wow, an actual conversation??  P.S. she’s conjuring the wedding dress vibe again with that dress choice.  He asks her to tell him something he doesn’t know about her, she responds with: I sleep naked.  Classy.  Then they make out…I’m grossed out.

AshLee draws a connection to the polar plunge and getting out of her comfort zone.  In an effort to surrender her need to control things in life (due to her abandonment issues) she hands Sean a scarf?  For him to lead their relationship?  I’m so confused.  Next thing you know she’s being blindfolded and carried.  I can think of other ways to accomplish this purpose…but, we have tears, she’s moving mountains.  I guess it worked.

What is Tierra wearing around her neck?  Odd combo with the toga-looking dress.

Roses go to: Lindsay, AshLee, TIERRABLE

Daniella and Selma are left to lick their wounds.  Chris Harrison is awful monotone tonight. 

Pack your swimsuits; they’re going to St. Croix.

True Life: I Lost All My Bachelor Notes...

This is a PSA to all of you out there, make sure you save your work!!  My computer timed out and I lost all of my detailed notes.  Since I refuse to subject myself to the 2 hour torture once again (and since it's a double feature this week) I'm just going to wing it on the recap and provide my general comments.

I wish I could have the hour of my life back that I spent working on the notes, or just the notes in general.  This was a hard lesson folks.

In light of these unfortunate events, here are 10 comments/take-aways from last night's episode.

1) Tierra is psycho.  Sean in his quest to unearth to drama lets it slip right under his nose.
2) In his date with Lindsay, they kept talking about how well they know each other...I've never seen them do anything but makeout
3) The group date was pretty much a disaster.  I was shocked when Daniella the drunky got the rose.  Who knew blubbering in front a guy could be so attractive?!
4) He and Catherine seem to have the strongest chemistry from what I have seen, although she's pretty much flown under the radar.
5) Tierra always agree with her gut decisions and I know full-well what else goes in there...Doritos, cookies, any other junk food item.  I think your gut might be lying to you.
6) I think it's unfair for Sean to be annoyed when the girls talk bad about each other to him, but yet he monopolizes one on one time with some of them for that very purpose.
7) Those poor goats...
8) Jackie had to learn some hard lessons tonight as well.  Use your time with the Bachelor to talk about yourself and not other people.
9) Confrontation with someone who's mentally unstable is like herding cats.  Good luck getting anything accomplished.
10) Was not surprised in the least to see Robyn in that limo going home...

Here's hoping I survive round 2 this evening.  Hopefully tonight's episode will provide enough material for some good commentary.

I'm sure I missed some other good moments, so feel free to comment with your top moments.

Busy, Busy, Busy

These days I feel as though we're never at a loss of things to do in the fostering and international adoption processes.  Between the mandatory book readings, physical exams, documentation out my ears, and Hague training, I feel like my head's been swimming these last couple of months.

While I'm tempted to complain, I know all of this is necessary to bring our child(ren) home.  Throughout this process, we've had our eyes opened to the adoption world, especially trans-racial adoption.  Both our foster baby and future adoptive baby will be a trans-racially adopted.  I'd like to think we live in a world that is universally accepting of different cultures and races, but the truth is we just don't.  Our unique family will face some unique challenges that requires our education, attention, and focus.

One wish I have is that we could just move to Ethiopia and raise our son or daughter within their culture.  It hurts to know they will never fully know and appreciate their culture and heritage in the same way they would if they were raised there.  Since that's not really an option for us right now, we're thinking through ways we can bring pieces of their culture home with us and incorporate it in to their lives.  Simple but significant things we are considering are the neighborhood we live, the friends we have, the church we call home, and the events we take part in.  We can't pretend their color of skin isn't an issue, but there has to be a balance in not over emphasizing their differences and not underplaying them either.  It will be fairly obvious to onlookers that our children are not biologically ours, therefore we're practically a walking poster for adoption and subjected to more looks, questions, and intrigue.  

A book I've been reading, In Their Own Voices: Transracial Adoptees Tell Their Stories, a theme throughout seems to be that black/bi-racial children raised by white parents seem to do best in situations where their parents made efforts to discuss adoption and racial issues openly.  Other books we have had to read which discuss these issues are Inside Transracial Adoption and The Whole Life Adoption Book (a great comprehensive adoption book).

We're fortunate to live in a city and go to a church that cultivates this understanding and seeks to bridge the gap.  We have had some bumps along the way, but we understand that our choice in how we have decided to grow our family puts us in a place where we have to do some educating every now and then.  I also want to put this out there, if you're white and curious when you see transracial families, I encourage you to be respectful to families you encounter.  I know you don't mean any harm, but think before you speak.  I've put some questions below for you to think through when you may encounter one of us in the mall, Target, Chick-Fil-A...

-Would I be offended if someone said this to my child?
-If this child were with an all black family (or fill in any race there) would I approach them with the same thoughts, actions, feelings?
-Remember that children at any age desperately want to fit in and be accepted.  Be overly cautious with their feelings and don't overtly point out differences that separate them from their family.