Chris Harrison and Sean are going to crash viewing
parties?! Sean apparently likes being
known by teenagers and young girls across America. He’s handing out roses, going to sorority
houses—taking his shirt off. I’m really
embarrassed for him…
To start off, we take a trip down memory lane to see the
full crazy potential of all of the girls.
Consider yourself poised and lucky if you didn’t end up on that film
roll. It was mostly AshLee and Tierra
footage, which was curious because I thought they may try to play AshLee up as the
sweetheart of the season.
'Wow' indeed Chris. He
asks Dez if this is what she was expecting coming on the show. She says no, I thought we’d all get along and
braid each other’s hair…Chris interrupts to say she must not have ever watched
this show.
Then we move on to Enemy 1: Tierrable. Selma brings up her inability to say good
morning despite their best efforts.
AshLee wasn’t expecting her confrontation. Lesley attacks her lack of sparkle. They all chime in on the polar bear plunge
and whether it was real or fake.
Brooke says this show is about seizing opportunities fake or not, and
maybe they were all just jealous that they didn’t get so creative. AND what do you know, she’s here!
And we have some behind the scenes footage? Weird.
What is she wearing? I
think she takes her outfit cues from strippers who shop in the juniors
department.
Chris asks if she was expecting this from her time on the
Bachelor. She says yes and no. She knows that when she walks in to a room,
she lights it up. Here we go again with
the sparkle…people judge her and the light that she has? What?
She still can’t control her eyebrows.
One is significantly higher than the other 99% of the time. She wishes she had thrown the first
impression rose since it put a target on her back. She thinks she was targeted because she didn’t
want to be friends with them. She doesn’t
want to be friends with people she’s competing with. Keep her eye on the prize. I think she confuses being polite, normal and
cordial with being BFFs with people.
Chris asks if this is normal for her. Are you always misunderstood? She says no.
I seriously question whether she has a single friend out in the
world. She doesn’t feel like she needs
to apologize for anything.
What’s with all the “raw” footage?
Now the ladies have the floor. Robyn tells her she’s delusional. Tierra has some convenient memory loss. There’s so much arguing about saying ‘good
morning’ and not being friendly. This is
a waste of time. Why don’t we bring out
some actual examples, like when she said she wanted to kill people and that
AshLee is a cougar? This is stupid.
St. Croix battle after the commercial break. Can’t wait…AshLee vs. Tierra.
Fortunately AshLee has a perfect memory. Tierra calls her a liar, and the steel trap
shuts that down. She says she was
bullied, and then everyone points out that she was the one starting the
confrontation. Blah, blah, blah, these
yahoos need to figure out real life.
Lesley says Tierra wasn’t bullied, just thought she made her own cot and
she needs to lie in it. Mwahaha.
Chris thinks she can control her eyebrows…Zing. Chris asks abut her sparkle. She talks about being 'Little Miss Nevada' and
her dad confirming she in fact has a sparkle.
Again, that’s fine to say to a 6 year old, but a grown adult? I dunno.
Then we talk about the bling on the left hand. I’m wondering if it’s real or from Stein
Mart. I guess she meant it when she said
she could go home and get engaged if she wanted to. She doesn’t want to comment on when she got
engaged? She’s shady.
Sarah’s on the hot seat next. On a side note, Sean makes a good Zoolander
face…
This trip down memory lane is SAD FACE! She says in confidence that she would be the
one in the end, and then she gets dumped. :( She expresses
how she thought he could have been the one and she’s sick of hearing how great
she is, but not good enough.
Dez is next, then Sean.
The trip down awkward memory lane.
I think your brother, as crazy as he may be, helped you dodge a
bullet with this one. She’s looking for
a soul mate, like her parents. She says
she didn’t expect to fall for Sean…umm isn’t that the entire premise of the
show?! #BachelorContestantPetPeeve. What were you expecting? A modeling or movie gig?
Ash is still looking for her Jerry Maguire to complete her…help
us! She’s head over ‘hills’ in love with
Sean. She is way too over the top and
too invested. Wait till you get a ring
on your finger before you bare your soul.
Chris: That was a first, you told him, stay here
and you walked away.
Ash: I didn’t know what to say.
Chris: Were you mad and angry?
Ash: No, I wasn’t angry. I was just confused
Chris: You definitely looked like you were pissed...ZIng
Ash says she’s not in love with him anymore. With her, he was a Southern gentleman, but
with the other girls he acted like a frat boy.
Truth.
Cue Sean, lot’s of girly screams. AshLee gets her chance to speak to him. Chris brings her up on stage so it’s not so
awkward. Basically, she’s too serious
and doesn’t laugh enough. She felt
dishonored by him having to go through a rose ceremony when he knew she wasn’t
the one. She wants to know why he didn’t
come back to check on her to see if she was okay. He says it would have made things worse and
brings up his time on the Bach-ette. She
calls him out and says well, you’re the man on this round and you could have
been a gentleman. She needs to
understand men and that when it’s over it’s over. He cut the cord at the rose ceremony, and
basically, he knew she was a strong woman and could handle it. Ouch.
Maybe I’m in the minority here, but I think Sean is a
chach. Ash says he told her in the
intimate time that he doesn’t have feelings for the other two…Sean denies it,
and not very well. Who’s the liar in
this situation?? The steel trap never
forgets!!!
Behind the scenes, they’re still discussing it…seriously
awkward. Although she has a couple of
screws loose, I’m going to agree with her on this one because I think he’s full
of crap. We’ll never know because the
cameras weren’t rolling. Maybe this is payback.
Sean says Dez hides things behind her smile. Dez says her brother actually liked
Sean. He says he has a funny way of
showing it. Truth.
Bloopers. The best is
Harrison cursing the lantern. Okay and maybe Sean racking himself over the front of the mountain bike handle bars...Bahaha
Based on the footage, I'm not sure who will be the "lucky" gal. I mean, I hope she has some issues with him taking his shirt off on command every 10 seconds...in a sorority house no less.
Alas, we'll have 3 hours of build up next week. Who do you think will be the next Bachelorette? My bet's on Des. She had a coy look about her when she said she was learning some things for her next relationship. I think she meant plural...just my guess.
